1. |
Beneath The Floor
01:35
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In a moment of ignorance
I forget the world has left me
Calloused by the memory
An inner child ceased to exist
Left alone to mourn
A life never fully lived
Abundance of laughter without me
Knowing I wasn’t missed
I push on like I’m strong
I push on like I’m not hurt
My pain becomes all I know
Pushes me to my worst
A life that could’ve been
Haunts me to my core
Healing who I was
Suppressing my desire for more
Yet I can’t help but wonder
Maybe this time will be different
I can find someone to confide in
Someone I can call a friend
Instead I find myself alone
Just as I was every time before
I envision myself dead
Head and feet six deep beneath the floor
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2. |
Comanche
01:53
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A hierarchy of idiocy
You reign supreme
Who you’ll never be
What you cannot see
The real deal, the big man
The one we love
An insecure punk
Who thinks he’s from above
Reach out to the hands of god
To run from me
You think you’re safe and protected
We’ll just see
Your pain starts and ends
With crossing me
Vengeance is mine to be had
I’ll watch you bleed
A city crawling with rejects
A rodent infested sea
Hatred runs through my veins
When that’s the destination to meet
So much tension,
So desperate to seek out the thrill
So much hate, my grip becomes the cause of the kill.
Hatred spawn from abandonment
My pain is yours to take
Feel my pain
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3. |
To My Oldest Friend
01:51
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How can I put into words
The hole left by your absence
A friend whenever I needed
Now a grave and a casket
Never said goodbye
Never figured out why
Why we grew apart
Fell from where we started
Gone too soon
I’ll always miss you
The laughter we used to share
Now silence, a wind of cold air
How could I call myself a friend
If I wasn’t there in the end
Backed into a corner
Not sure where to turn
The door was open
You figured what could it hurt
I wish I was there
To tell you there is a light
I wish I was there
Maybe I could’ve saved your life
Feels impossible to move on
Hold on to the days that are gone
Where it felt like you were by my side
Where it felt like you hadn’t died
We’ll meet again
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4. |
||||
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Impossible to save face
Once beloved turned disgrace
Depression boiled into rage
Act out, drowning in shame
Missing out on your life
Becoming memories past
There’s nothing to make right
A love buried deep into grass
What have I done
Become someone
I never wanted to be
My hate overwhelmed me
My hands became my demise
Pushed past the point of redemption
I’ve become someone I despise
Left beyond recognition
Faced with the pain I’ve caused
I’m filled with regret
Rift between what I love
And what I can’t grasp
My thoughts of betrayal
My hate weighed me down
Hate shifting inwards
I allow myself to drown
As the water fills your lungs
Remember what you’ve done
The broken hearts of those you love
Unbroken silence as we move on
Drown me out
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5. |
Found Dead
02:23
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Facing off again
With the enemy locked within
Can I fight enough
To see if tomorrow’s this rough
See the light that’s claimed
To be my salvation from this plane
Or will this breath be my last
Letting go to forget my past
Can I find solace in the normalcy of life
Or will my hunger
Be the catalyst for my strife
The constant hatred for myself for never giving in
The constant question, what if this time I’m on the brink
How can I know if I am close to my salvation’s arms
Or being pulled into the abyss to sink?
What am I worth in a world that never considers me?
Where is the end to this secluded suffering?
How can I find a reason to live when it would be easiest if I stopped breathing?
The world would turn just fine
Without my heart beating
The world would turn just fine
If I stopped breathing
Found dead, found dead
Blood splattered on tiled wall
Found dead, found dead
Closed casket to send me off
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